they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
