dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
