Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
