Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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