you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
