Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): The first sip always goes straight to my vagina. http://tfl.nu/w086
  Replies (17) Good night (5944) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys. http://tfl.nu/5hlm
  Replies (23) Good night (5349) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me. http://tfl.nu/oae8
  Replies (26) Good night (8803) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me. http://tfl.nu/og6e
  Replies (11) Good night (1305) Bad night (3882)
• Favorite

  (581): View more from Quebec

  I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (581): I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset. http://tfl.nu/8lj9
  Replies (33) Good night (1384) Bad night (5724)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year http://tfl.nu/dryh
  Replies (3) Good night (1727) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go. http://tfl.nu/ktl8
  Replies (14) Good night (1957) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am. http://tfl.nu/rp62
  Replies (8) Good night (801) Bad night (1090)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration. http://tfl.nu/hksr
  Replies (5) Good night (838) Bad night (1689)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with. http://tfl.nu/g52q
  Replies (8) Good night (845) Bad night (1324)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter http://tfl.nu/864b
  Replies (5) Good night (1157) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything? http://tfl.nu/t3z5
  Replies (24) Good night (2652) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.

  (1-859): View more from Kentucky

  ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection. (1-859): ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave... http://tfl.nu/0oli
  Replies (3) Good night (753) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus http://tfl.nu/ryiv
  Replies (3) Good night (879) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened. http://tfl.nu/b4bs
  Replies (2) Good night (399) Bad night (280)

Randomize