oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
how do you play pong handcuffed?
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.