I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
