You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
