We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
