I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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