I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
