it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
