Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
