Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
