I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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