does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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