Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
