I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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