I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize