Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Randomize
