i don't plan on having that self control this summer
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
