Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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