Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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