She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
