Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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