i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
If I die, sorry about rent.
I would fuck him just for his dog
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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