i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
