Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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