since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize