I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
