Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
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once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
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his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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