We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
