Welp...herpes.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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