i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
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Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
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It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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