so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i want to swaddle you in tequila
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
