Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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