o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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