theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
