I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize