We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
