We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
