He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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