don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!