my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
