she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
