Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize
