in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
