I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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