STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
