i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
